My vision is vague as I try to fix my gaze on her with one thousand thousands of mental rejections. My legs are losing all the strength but I am fighting all the weariness with everything in me.
I would love to think that this is just an awful joke. That she knows nothing because I ensured my secret was safe. But her dauntless composure and the look in her eyes are relatively adequate to stop me from deluding myself.
She is not prevaricating it. She knows it. And now that I think about it, that was why she spoke to me with so much chilled detest back there. Her ground to fire me was not what she said back there I was being incompetent in my job which was a very cheap lie. It was this. Now it all makes sense. That was why she was so audacious and minacious. But how did she find out? Her son alone doesn’t know, or, does he?
“I see that you are appalled. Brace yourself because we are going to have a very long talk given that this will be your last day here.” She speaks after noticing my qualms.
Of course, this most definitely would be a lengthy talk if she knew about this. But what does she have to say about it? And if she knew, then why did she keep mute about it back there in front of the Mazurs and the Mauricios? This doesn’t look good at all. My insides are beginning to get upset by the fear surging in me.
“How did you find out, Madam?” I think out loud because that part is still tickling my core.
“Did you think you could hide it from me? Sorry, but I am not gullible like my son whom you have bewitched with your witchcraft. And in case you are still curious, I would let you know that the loyalty of everyone who sets their feet in this compound or is affiliated with the Mazurs, lies only with this family. So guess what? Your little pathetic plea with the doctor to keep this forbidden secret a secret was useless. And, that pesky friend of yours, she also knows where her loyalty lies as well.”
Hell is breaking down on me!
I can maybe understand about the doctor, but Julie? Why on earth would she betray me like this, huh? She knew just how much I hate betrayal and how much I wanted Ray and me to handle this ourselves. I would have exempted her betrayal if she told Ray, but her mother? What the…
“Does your son know?” I brat out, my heart throbbing with pain and anxiety.
“Ooh, he is my son now? What happened to, ‘my love, my Ray’, huh? What? Did you just grow some brains in a flash after realizing that your plan to lure him into your skimming trap of becoming a Mazur will never work?” She asks in a tone that I don’t like at all.
But forget her unnerving nettlesome tone and disgusted reflection. Who told her that I wanted to become a Mazur? Why can’t she accept that Ray and I are in love? Oops! Correction, we were! Not anymore. But, why does it sound like this woman doesn’t just know about my baby, but she knew about our affair too?
“I suspected you two a long time ago, and all that while, Irma, do you know why I kept my mouth shut about your stupid fling with my son?” She decides to ease my apprehensions, closing the tiny gap between us again and scanning my face as if searching for something. Or trying to corroborate something.
With the way her eyes are ricocheting to all the corners of my face, digging through my poor pale skin, I already hate where this conversation is headed. But what can I do? I messed big times and with the worst people. I guess, I will have to bear this for the last moment. After this night, they will never have the chance nor reason to insult me or bleed this scorn on me ever again.
“Why, madam?” I give her the contentment to tear the last part of my heart that is still intact. I know that is why she is here anyway.
“I wanted, I tried so hard to find that one thing that would have hooked my son, the great Rayson Drew Mazur, to a wretched cheap pest like you. I wanted to believe that maybe, just maybe, there was something great hidden in you that I had not seen. But in the end, do you know what I realized, Irma?”
She pauses, her eyes digging through mine. I hold my breath. There is too much heat arising that is why I can’t breathe. I swallow hard as her lips part, discharging her next words.
“There is utterly nothing fascinating about you. You are miserable, a nobody, stupid, immoral, and a piteous gold digger!”
An upsurge of pain spews in me, almost paralyzing me, but I get a hold of myself. It’s okay. That is her perception of me, but deep inside I know that is not who I am. And I can not change what anyone thinks about me. But then, maybe I can challenge her.