"Akesh is a jerk!"

My heart was like a slice at the sound of this. But I can't be completely angry. I myself chose to listen to things I shouldn't have heard. Maybe this was my initial punishment.

"But you like it, don't you, honey? The proof is that you are very excited."

My tears were getting heavier. Sad but also happy. Yes, I am indeed crazy. But I was a bit surprised. In such a drunken and semi-conscious state, why is he so smooth with dirty talk? While I enjoy it instead, like a stupid masochist enslaved by desire. Unlucky!

***

"You'd better go now, Nalaya. Forget what happened last night."

The weather felt a little hot because the air conditioner had been turned off. Judging from the scorching sun, it was already nine o'clock in the morning. When he woke up, Akesh immediately put on a full suit. He was so shocked that he and Nalaya were in the same blanket, both naked.

His head was dizzy, he realized that he was drunk last night. But he could only translate what happened last night after putting on the shirt. After that, he woke Nalaya up and told her to put on her clothes. He even turned his back to the girl, unable to see her. As if we never passed a hot night together.

"Sis, Nalaya doesn't want to. Let's talk first, shall we?"

"Go, Nalaya! While I still talk to you!"

This was the beginning of my life's suffering. The only brush that gives me the color of life drives me away. But we'll see. Sis, the farther away you are, I'll be your shadow until you can't run! At the very least, you should know how I feel.

After that incident, I disappeared for three days. Ignoring the invitation to hang out from the chat group in which there was Kak Akesh and his friends. I have indeed entered their gang.

You guys think I'm giving up? Of course not! I rewatched dozens of romance movies to strategize how to get Kak Akesh. Although I never got it from the beginning.

The first strategy, I will appear around him, but not really close. I just want him to see my existence. I was the shadow that the more he ran away, the closer I got to him.

So today when it was time for lunch, I went to the cafeteria later than usual. In the corner near the stairs, three young men: Kak Bina, Kak Ical, and Kak Akesh were chatting, joking while enjoying food.

I chose to sit at a table where they could see. Exactly two tables apart from them. Alone.

"Come on, join us here. Why are you there alone?" Shouted Kak Ical.

"Not yet, Sis, I'm waiting for my friend, I've made an appointment."

Until lunch was over, of course, none of his friends approached. There were actually two girls, but that was because all the tables were full. Apparently the universe supported my plan.

Occasionally my eyes glanced at Kak Akesh and his friends. The man who was the center of gravity stole a glance at me. I smiled with satisfaction. I am sure that he will not ignore me so easily.

I was wrong, but didn't he love me so much? He often said that I was considered like his own sister. I am indeed the same age as his younger brother who is now studying abroad. Right now I kept suggesting to myself that Akesh would only get angry with me for a moment.

Like an older brother who will forgive and accept his younger brother, whatever mistakes he makes. Although, I really hate to admit the fact that we are in the friend zone. Or even the brother of the zone?

***

Nala did not know the upheaval that occurred in Akesh.

To be honest, I was confused about what kind of attitude I should have towards Nala. Of all the things, how could he like me who was already like his own brother? Does he like me or just vents his lust. Ah... Did we make love that night? So, why are there blood spots on my mattress spray?

Thinking about this makes my stomach sick. The contents of my mind were very tight until my stomach acid recurred. Then now what? I told him to stay away, but he appeared in front of me.

"You guys are fighting? It's been a long way like this," said Bina. The fucking one who is quiet but once talks to the heart. What the hell is wrong with the woman's intuition? Hah!

"I know!" I grinned. Cover it all.

"Eh yes too, usually your 'sister' sticks to you, it's like saying that even if you go to the toilet, he will wait in front," Ical chimed in. These two people are indeed a super combo.

The basis of these two bastards. Their words added to my thoughts. I remembered Nala's attitude all this time. An attitude that I initially thought was a funny behavior and affection of a younger brother to his brother.

Actually, being near Nala makes me happy. He is a pleasant person. Even though I don't know much, I'll be happy to teach him anything. Spending time with him made me find the figure of a younger brother. Maybe it's because I'm not close to my younger brother Tasya? Yes, it could be.

Flashback...

The first time I met Nala was 12 years ago or when I was eight years old. It was the first time my parents had a big fight.

"I'm going to take Caca abroad, you stay with Akesh!"

Mama cried hysterically after slamming their wedding photo on the floor until it cracked. After that I didn't know what they were talking about. Both of them shouted angrily. I closed both ears while sitting trembling.

I was scared, so I ran out of the house. Hiding, squatting among the plants in front of the house. My hands were still covering my ears, tears dripping down my cheeks. My body was still shivering but I was speechless.

"Do you want a lollipop? But don't cry anymore."

I looked at the figure of the little child in front of me. His right hand held out a lollipop. His eyes sparkled, he smiled so wide that he could see his two teeth that were missing.

"In the past, my father gave me lollipops before he died. He said so that I wouldn't be sad anymore."

Oh, it turns out that there is a child my age who has been abandoned by his father. Not much different from my fate which my father will soon leave abroad.

Since that meeting, Nala has often come to my house. He said he and his mother had just moved here a week ago. I also became not so lonely even though my mother was busy working. When I feel sad, I will come to his house and stay overnight. He also occasionally stayed at my house.

But among all of them, there is a strange fact that our mother is a best friend at school. But since graduating, they separated because their mother moved to the city. Since then they have never met again.

Flashback is complete.

***

There were two women who approached Nala. Surprisingly, they didn't seem to know each other. The reason is, the woman with shoulder-length hair and was stabbed was even fun chatting by herself. As if ignoring Nala. The child was actually cool with his cellphone. It seems that the two are not Nala's friends.