I heard murmurs outside. Most of the noises went in one ear and out the other, mainly because I couldn't focus on anything. My thoughts were quiet now. And in the absence of sounds, I heard three distinct voices.

What caught my attention was that they weren't speaking Portuguese. I could only make out whispers, but I knew the conversation had to be about me.

It was Gavin, Donovan, and one of the doctors, the one called Solloman. I vaguely remembered him introducing himself when they put the medication in my vein. I didn't respond, and he took my silence as fatigue, or so I thought. It was very easy to sense the pain in their voices. They were speaking in English, probably because, given the doctor's name, he was also American and it was more comfortable to converse in their own language.

Gavin had saved me. Again.

I wasn't angry with him. In fact, if I were one hundred percent honest, I would say I was grateful. Even so, it was a tiny, insignificant speck compared to the frustration of having failed once more. How did he know I was going to drown? I made sure to be silent. I didn't even struggle as I swallowed liters of water. Or maybe, as my life was slipping away, some strangled sound from my throat gave me away?

He was very nervous. While holding me in his arms, he kept saying what he was doing. He tried his best to calm me down, but it was he who radiated tension. His eyes and face were swollen from crying. When he opened the car door, he placed me in the front seat, adjusted the seatbelt, and looked at me so intensely that I couldn't look away. I think this was his way of trying to reassure me.

But in the rare moments when he touched me, I wanted to scream. And scream and scream even more.

I knew I was weak and couldn't stand on my own, but physical contact was extremely... repulsive. I didn't want to feel any touch, no matter how small. The desperate sensations seemed to intensify when that happened.

From then on, I had been in the arms of Gavin and Donovan. I even received a subtle caress on my hair, though I couldn't remember from whom. If I had, I would have quickly pulled away.

If they noticed my obvious discomfort, they didn't mention it. However, I was willing to bet that Gavin at least had a suspicion.

Where would I go when I left that hospital? It seemed very fancy and specialized. It certainly wasn't public, given that my... host was wealthy. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a black spot in one of the corners of the wall. I turned my head to see better and confirmed it was a camera.

Well, nothing surprising, really.

I had tried to drown, to throw myself into the sea, and they already knew I did bad things to myself. They would probably commit me to some sanatorium for an indefinite period. Was that what the three of them were discussing now?

I paid more attention to the conversation. Dr. Solloman said he needed my information or something like that.

There was that too. Besides being the suicidal and apparently crazy girl, I was also a girl without a name or age.

Saying my name and age represented something: that I existed. And that seemed terribly ironic. I could have laughed if it didn't hurt so much. All this time, no one cared. Now I was just expressing the anonymous part that always seemed to belong to me. I was nothing and no one, this time officially.

Seconds of silence outside the door. A sigh. I knew what was going to happen.

The doorknob turned. Two tall and terribly worried men entered the room. Donovan was the one who opened the door, and his eyes were shining in a way I couldn't interpret.

They approached me slowly, almost noiselessly, as if I were a cornered animal that could run away at any moment. Come to think of it, they weren't far from the truth.

Donovan seemed like he was going to take my hand but pulled back at the last second, extending it just inches from my fingers.

"Hello," he simply said. I saw him swallow hard.

Gavin stood beside him. Both hands were in his pants pockets, and he seemed unsure of what to say.

I looked at the two of them. I didn't know what to say, even if I could. Donovan spoke again:

"You are safe. We're here. It's all right."

His voice was murmuring and reassuring. I noticed he was wearing a suit and tie. Did he leave work immediately to come see me?

Did he... really care about me that much?

The doubts in my mind and the feeling of relief and surprise clashed in my mind, a hard-fought battle. I didn't know what to believe or feel. My expression remained neutral, but my eyes filled with tears.

Both noticed at the same time. Gavin placed his hands near my tensed legs, as if holding back from hugging me.

"Y-you're alive," he stammered. His eyes blinked to hold back tears. "You're alive, you're alive, you're alive," he repeated with emphasis on the last "alive." It seemed like he was saying it both to me and to himself.

It was true. I was alive. But not for long.

I wanted to apologize to them. It must have been hard dealing with this situation. But it was getting harder and harder to care.

So I said nothing. I just watched them, powerless, from the comfortable and immaculate hospital bed.