“So, why were you scolding your little cousin, Jane? Don’t you see that she and her baby are
sick?” Sandra asked.
I was like, oh! She still called her my little cousin. That meant she didn’t hear the part where I
said she was not my family. I heaved a sigh of relief. That was a great miracle. Now, I could
relax again. That was close, that was very, very close. I had to watch the way I speak
henceforth.
“I am sorry, babe. I was just blaming her for not telling me that the Chloe was sick since last
night.” I lied.
“That is okay, I guess she just didn’t want to bother you because of your busy schedule, but she
did tell me.”
“She did?”
“Yes.”
“Oh my gosh. Thank you so much for being there for me and my cousin.”
“It’s a pleasure, baby.”
Everything was back to normal. Sandra didn’t allow me to pay the hospital bill. She paid it
herself thinking that she was doing a good thing. According to her, she was doing a service to
my family, a family she would one day become a member to. She didn’t know that she was just
paying the hospital bills of her co-girlfriend.
Three days later, Jane and her daughter were discharged from the hospital. I was at work, and it
was nearing closing time when she called me.
“Hello, John.”
“Yes, what is it?”
“We have been discharged. We need to go back home. Could you please, come and give us a
lift home?” She asked mildly.
“A lift home?!” I sneered. “As your Uber or what?”
“Please, we have both not fully recovered. We can’t go stand by the road and be looking for a
cab or a bike.” She explained.
“So, your next option is me? As whom? Do you know how much a car costs? You sit in a
hospital and use your ungrateful mouth to ask me to come drive you home. Am I your
chauffeur?”
“Okay, John. Just leave it. We will manage.”
“The only reason that I am still allowing you call me ‘John’ is because of the façade that you are
my cousin. Otherwise, you would have gone back to calling me ‘Sir’, ingrate.”
“I said it is fine, we will manage, wicked man.” She dared to say.
“You know you can only say that to me from a distance. Try that when we are together, and I will
rearrange your dental formula.”
“Forgive me, Sir. Anyway, we are hungry.”
“If you are hungry, call Sandra. If you like don’t mind what you say when you two are together,
beef.”
I dropped the call and continued rounding off the day’s work. It had been a stressful day for me.
I had had too many clients, and I was not just tired; I was absolutely exhausted. When I was
done, I closed for the day and drove home. When I got home, I expected to meet Jane and her
daughter home. Instead, I met my main door ajar and neither of them could be found. Angry, I
went in and started moving from room to room, shouting.
“Jane! Jane!!” But there was no answer.
I went back to the living room and was about to go lock the main door when I saw her coming
home, carrying her baby in her arms.
“Where have you been?” I asked. “Where did you go to?”
“I am so sorry, John. I didn’t know that you would be home soon.”
“So, my being home early is now your only requisite for you to be home? I thought you said you
and your daughter were not yet fully recovered?”
“I am sorry.”
“Be sorry for yourself. By the way, you haven’t still answered me question. Now tell me, where
did you go?”
“I went to see the neighbour who helped me the other day.”
“You went to see the neighbour? So, you went to a neighbour’s house. Jane, what is wrong with
you? When you come into someone’s house, can’t you observe the way the person does his
things and follow suit?” I asked, still angry.
“I don’t understand what you mean.”
“Of course, you can’t understand, chicken brain. Now, let me ask you. Since you started living
here, or let me say since you got stuck here against my wish, have you ever seen me visiting a
neighbour?”
“No.”
“So, why then do you want to change the way things happen in my house? Have you got no
sense? Do you or do you not have the ability to obey simple instructions?”
“I do, John. I am sorry.”
“You have such a reptilian brain; I tell you for real. I wonder who the man was who even thought
of having a child with you. I guessed he realized his mistake early and disappeared. Now, what
has this child eaten?”
“We ate something at the neighbour’s house.” She replied and wished immediately that she
hadn’t.
“So, you have started eating in neighbours’ houses? Okay, that’s right, from now onwards, you
will be eating in that house. No food for you in this house, since you cannot cook.” I threatened.
“I told you I was still too weak. I called Sandra and she said she was busy and couldn’t make it.”
“Is Sandra your cook? Enh? Tell me. Is my fiancée your cook? So, you are saying that if it was
just, you and Chloe living in this house, you wouldn’t cook something for her, ehn, you this
incompetent mother.”
“I am sorry.”
“Be sorry for yourself. My friend, get into the house and stop standing there and looking at me
like a fool, beef.”
She walked into the house, and I walked after her, throwing insults. I was in a very bad mood
and good thing too; she chose not to offer any word again. Otherwise, who knows what would
have happened to her that afternoon? Chloe was asleep in her arms. She walked into her
bedroom and place on the bed. She came back to the living room and asked if there was
anything she could do.
“I would have loved you to go get something for us to eat, but since you have eaten at a
neighbour’s house, which of course, will be your new eating place now, there will be no need. I
will call Sandra and ask us to meet somewhere in the evening to have supper. We will be eating
out tonight. As for you, you are on your own. Now, get out.”