I remembered that some people said that love makes you see things that are more beautiful than they really are.
Right now, I watched the man sitting across from me, his arms folded on the table with his head resting on them as he slept. I propped an elbow, laid my chin on my hand, and gazed at him with interest.
I had noticed this many times before, but it never failed to surprise me every time. He was still as handsome as the day I met him, and he had never lost that childlike innocence even though he was currently in his late twenties.
I still couldn’t believe that the man sleeping in front of me was the same man who was the CEO of the biggest company NA Games Inc., which was known all over the world for its global and international success in producing the best video games.
I had never tried their games before, but my brother loved to play them whenever he had time, and his eyes would always light up whenever I bought him a new video game of theirs for his birthday and as a Christmas gift.
As I continued to watch this man, I couldn’t help but feel amazed and confused at the same time.
‘Nathaniel Adams…’
‘Why me?’
It was a question I would ask myself for a long, long time.
Out of all the beautiful, intelligent, and successful women out there, he chose me.
Just why?
***
Five years ago, I was in love with the idea of romance.
My friends sometimes called me ‘Julia the Hopeless Romantic’ and ‘Julia the Innocent Girl’ because I often talked about love and how much it interested me. I would talk about how I longed for a harmonious relationship filled with trust and affection.
In high school, I read a lot of romance novels and squealed about cheesy romance movies. I also got really excited whenever one of my friends was dating.
But I never experienced love for myself, probably because I was too scared to try, or because I found love in books and movies much more interesting than in real life. I had my fair share of crushes, but they were just pleasant yet hopeless dreams.
I wasn’t the most attractive girl on campus at the time. I had short, mousy brown hair and a few pimples on my face due to puberty. My eyes were a dull shade of gray, and my features were pretty plain. I was basically unnoticeable.
It was not until I graduated from high school that I noticed the obvious changes in myself. My hair grew longer until it fell in soft waves below my shoulders, my eyes seemed a little larger than usual, my chest filled out considerably, and my curves began to develop. It was a fascinating change as I could see that I was beginning to mature from a meek-looking teenager to a young adult who was now eighteen.
During my university years, it seemed like everyone around me was either dating or in a relationship. As a freshman student, I was curious about finding my own soulmate and finally decided to give it a try.
My ‘soulmate’ at that time was a student from the same college who majored in IT. I went to a karaoke bar with friends who invited some guys they knew. After I sang two songs and everyone clapped for me, one of the guys approached me and asked my name.
Most of the people there were drunk, but I was one of the few who was sober. I didn’t like to drink that much and I preferred water to beer.
But this guy… I could tell he was drunk.
Most of the people there were already drunk, but I was one of the few who were still sober. I didn’t like to drink that much and preferred water over beer.
But this guy… I could tell that he was drunk.
We arranged to meet at a nearby coffee shop. I remember how impressed I was that he remembered our date, even though he was tipsy at the time. I even thought to myself that maybe he’d forgotten, that it was all just harmless fun, nothing to be taken seriously.
But he didn’t forget.
We talked a lot and discovered that we had a few things in common, much to my delight. I found that he was easy to talk to and liked to laugh a lot. He had a natural charm that immediately drew me to him.
I really liked Tom.
We started dating after that. He was patient, gentle, and had a natural way with words. He never got mad about anything, and he never got mad at me. He also always insisted on paying when we ate together.
He had hinted a few times about sleeping together, sometimes even bringing it up as subtly as possible. However, we weren’t that far into our relationship, so I politely turned him down. Even after that, he was very understanding and promised to wait for me when I was ready.
He was the perfect gentleman. I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world.
It turned out that I was wrong.
After dating for a year, I planned to surprise him on his birthday with the wallet he’d been excitedly talking about for months. He didn’t ask me to buy it for him, and he didn’t imply anything to me at all, but I took note of this detail simply because I wanted to make him happy. Even though money was tight, I did my best to save up just so I could see that delighted smile on his face.
But the moment I snuck into his apartment, I heard something.
Something that shattered my heart into a thousand little pieces.
As I approached the bedroom, the sound of moaning reached my ears. It wasn’t a sound of pain, but of pleasure. I could even hear a woman’s voice saying “faster” over and over.
I wasn’t naive enough not to realize what was happening.
I wanted to deny it right then and there. I tried to pretend that I was hearing things, that I was just tired and hallucinating.
But when I froze right there, the noises kept getting louder. No matter how hard I tried to pretend it was a dream, reality hit me harder than a sledgehammer.
And when I opened the door, it only got worse.
The sight of Tom and another woman in his bed would never be erased from my memory for a long, long time.