"Good morning mum"

I went to hug my mum as she was cooking in the kitchen for us. It was quite early and she was already up as usual cooking for us as she does when we were little.

"Good morning, dear" she greets back when I sat on one of the kitchen stools and watch her.

Our lecturer told us to come in this early else he would fail us on our nest test and it made me wonder if he actually wants to teach us and make us better or just stress the life out of us till, we drop dead? Because I don't understand at all. You can't be treating somebody's child like this honestly.

Well, there's little we can do concerning that aside just follow the instructions to avoid future problems with him that might lead to further punishments. I hope not to be at his receiving end.

"You have an early day" she said, I nod with a small smile.

"Yes, ma"

These days mum is ever around in the morning, she is always in, mostly in the late afternoons and evenings. She does her work early in the morning and makes sure she is around and when she is home, she is in her room or sometimes making us something to eat.

Hardly she goes out or have any work in the afternoon and sometimes in the morning, she is just home and not going anywhere.

I guess this morning is one of those mornings.

"No work this morning?" I asked when she served me some scrambled eggs with some toast by the side. I took the juice from the fridge to eat with my food.

"No work this morning" she smiles at me and took a plate for herself before coming to sit beside me. "Your siblings are still sleeping?" she asked when she took a bite from her food.

"Yes ma, they are" I answered her then passed her one cup of juice which she appreciated.

We ate in silence, just enjoying the delicious breakfast mum prepared. Although it hasn't been a while since mum cooked us something but I do miss her cooking in most days and wish she could cook for us all the time but that would be tiring for her. She wouldn't mind but we need to do things ourselves and not expect her to do for us everything all the time.

"I love it" I said after a while. 

Mum looks at me with a smile then nods "Thank you dear, pour me some more juice" she requested.

"Okay ma" I did as she asked and she thanked me then we continued eating.

I heard her sigh so I look at her then to her plate that was almost empty then back to her face that held a little frown. I was going to ask what the matter was but she was already speaking.

"How's school? Did you make new friends? How's Leo? I haven't seen much of him lately" mum asked, the frown her face held was gone and was replaced with a small smile.

I returned the smile and dropped the fork on the plate while I took a sip of juice and tried to collect my thoughts and seek what to tell her. I really don't need to lie about anything, she's my mum and she gets me... most of the time.

"Well, school is good and I am still wishing I could stay home and have those classes online just like I wanted before" I said.

Mum sighs again then placed her hand on mine "Baby girl, I don't want you to live in fear again"

"Live in fear again" I said at the same time as she. I looked away and tried not to cry as I blinked my eyes several times.

It's coming again, that feeling... that ill feeling of what's going to happen next, the feeling that dad will escape prison and come for me, just like I saw in my dreams and he would just end things completely.

"Dear, I want you to be normal... live a normal life and not be bothered of what is coming after you"

"But something is coming after me... someone is coming for me and the fact that I know who it is makes it even scarier than when I didn't know. I know who he is but I am still not sure of his intense hatred for me" I cried when I looked at her.

Mum studied my face for a while before a frown creased her brows and worry spread across her face.

"You are not telling me something" she said after a moment of silence.

I jumped to my feet then walked over the counter so that my back was to her and I was facing the sink. I silently sobbed as I bow my head, and cleaned the tears that fell.

I don't want anybody to worry about me, I am scared but I don't want to show it and it all proves that no matter what happens, I will never live peacefully, without having strange feelings, fear, and constant nightmares. That would be my life and it makes me sad, just thinking about it.

I heard her sigh, then the scraping of the stool on the floor, footsteps moving closer to me and her hand that gave my shoulder a comforting squeeze.

"What is going on? Tell me what the matter is" she asked softly.

The tears had stopped already and I was just sniffling so I turned to look at my worried looking mum "He is coming" I whispered then looked ahead of her "It will be worse this time" I complete then she brought me in her warm motherly embrace.

Maybe I don't really have to say anything to get that assurance or warmth that my family are willing to give to me, I just have to let them and just try to let go of those memories... that's if they'll let me be.

...

I didn't need to tell mum anything than what I said this morning when she sat me down and called the prison head to confirm that dad was still behind bars. We were informed that he tried to escape several times but it was unsuccessful, Thank GOD. 

Even with that information, mum assured me that everything will be good and dad wouldn't escape to come hurt me, she told me that I am safe and that I have nothing to worry about. I know I do but I didn't want to make her any worried than she is already, and knowing how I feel now so I just agree with her so that I can leave the house for my lectures.

I got to school on time and that was because Leo saw me and offered to take me to school. The car ride was mostly silent aside from when we greet each other, asked about how we were faring and said byes when we got to school.

Before I had the chance to move further away from his car, he asked that we saw after school, I nodded in agreement and he said he will call me to let me know where we should meet up at.

It felt nice talking to him after such a long time and I couldn't wait to actually sit down and have a chat with my best friend. That was how much I missed him.

Now, we were walking by a park side by side in silence as we watched the activities that was going on around us. Soon, he stopped where a bench was located at and gestured that I sat which I did.

We didn't say anything for some minutes and just looked ahead of each other. I wanted to say something but I don't know if he had something to say so I waited for him to begin which he did.

"It feels good to sit beside you like this" he turns so that he was looking at me and I turned to look at him "You know, just enjoying each other's company, the quiet around us..." he trailed off and I smile with a nod.

"Yes, me too" I agreed with a smile he matched.

"I know that we haven't really being on talking terms for a while because of..." he began but let his words trail off and I totally understand.

Our situation is sort of complicated and I just want to make things okay and normal for us both.

He drew closer to me and I turned my face to the other side so that he doesn't see my teary eyes.

Aside from the fact that I am trying to control myself and keep myself in check and not hurt whenever I see him and Amara so close and after that incident that happened between us, I still keep getting that chilling feeling I told my mum about this morning.

Every day it keeps growing intense and it leaves me breathless and scared of what will happen next. Even when we were assured that he was still locked up, but had tried severally to escape prison, the feeling never left me.

I don't know if they understand how scared I am but the feeling is unexplainable. I want to cry every time and just stop school to just stay home without anyone knowing of my existence.

"I also can't say I understand how you feel but I can tell that you need your friend with you especially at this moment" he said and I turned to look at him not minding that my eyes were going to out pour the tears they managed to gather.

"Don't keep it all to yourself, you are scared and I can feel it... I can sense that you aren't okay and that you feel so scared," he held my shoulders and rubbed them lightly "Talk to me... tell me about it... rant about it... scream about it, I'll listen... we have been besties for a really long time and there is nothing that can stop me from being there for the girl I grew to love and cherish"